THE WALL

I didn't drive regularly right after getting my driver's license. At the time I was a broke student, and the insurance company my parents had at the time wanted to charge some ridiculous amount in order to add my inexperienced self to the policy. If i remember correctly, it was around an extra two grand a year. My dad was like "Oh HECK no" and that was that. Unfortunately, because i lived in their house, i couldn't just not be on the insurance. Because i was now an official licensed driver, i either HAD to be on the insurance, or I had to be excluded of off it. There was no neutral ground. The one caveat of having an otherwise reasonably priced policy in a city notorious for having exorbitant insurance costs.

So, my parents dutifully sent my information to their insurer, which meant that if i decided to drive their car, should i get into an accident, we would all be screwed.

Needless to say, i was not allowed behind the wheel.

I was outwardly disappointed with this turn of events - what's the point of being young and licensed and not having access to a car? - but inwardly i was relieved. I was legally able to drive, (a great accomplishment among my peers) but despite being given the green light by the PA Dept of Transportation, i still felt uncomfortable behind the wheel. Fortunately i didn't have to admit that fact, and i could go around blaming State Farm (or was it Allstate?) for my lack of driving ability.

After some months of languishing in driving purgatory, my parents switched insurers. The next company's rates were way more reasonable and finally I was added to the policy. My first assignment? An errand. Natch. My mom asked me to make a run to the CVS to pick up some stuff for the house. (I can't remember what.)

I was a nervous wreck. I had driven two?, maybe three times since receiving my license, and it had always been in the presence of an experienced driver. This time I would be the experienced driver. (HA!) The only other person with me would be my brother, who had not yet gotten his license. Add to that the fact that i would be driving the family car. A 1984 Chevy Caprice Station wagon, the other car was too pretty for my newbie hands. The horror! I prayed no one i knew (or would want to know) would see me.

Still, driving was driving, and though i wasn't manning the prettiest vehicle, i desperately needed the practice. I pushed my nerves (and vanity) to the background.

My brother and I made it to CVS without incident. Despite the ugliness that was my transportation, I was feeling pretty good when we walked through the automatic doors. I may have had damp pits on my person, and the father of all jalopies in the parking lot, but i did it. We made it there, alive. Applaud me. We finished our shopping and got in the car to make the return trip home. My pulse had calmed considerably, i was a lot less nervous than i was on the trip up.

Foot on the brake, I turned the engine on. My brother immediately began fiddling with the radio.( some things never change.) I put the car in gear, placed my right hand on the passengers side headrest and looked out the rear window to make sure there were no pedestrians. Satisfied the coast was clear, I gave the engine some (ok a lot of) gas and --

BAM!!!

I felt every bone in my body vibrate.

WTF?

Apparently, instead of putting the car in reverse, i had put it in drive. We had slammed into the brick wall of CVS.

For the life of me, to this day, i have no idea how we didn't just go through the wall. I hit it HARD.

The noise was loud enough to send CVS security outside to see what was going on. What he saw was me, red faced and sheepish looking.

Due to the wonders of my imagination, i had already conjured up the outcome of this nasty turn of events -- i'd be arrested, my license would be revoked, my parents would have to pay for the damage. Oh the shame i'd bring upon the family escutcheon!

I got out of the car, to survey the damage. To my amazement, there was none, to the building OR the car. I began explain to the explaining to the security guy what happened. He didn't really seem to care one way or another. The building was fine and I was fine, he just warned me to double check my gears in the future -- with a smirk on his face i might add.

Totally hate him.

At that point, whatever mental progress i had made on the drive up, had suddenly evaporated. I did not want to drive home, and had my brother had ANY experience whatsoever behind the wheel of a car, i would have probably made him do it. As it was, he had none, and so I had to.

My first and last experience with sweaty palms. On the drive home i had the steering wheel gripped up something serious. (Eww gross.)

I told my mom what happened - "conveniently" never mentioned it to my dad who probably would have had a coronary (though now that we are years past the incident i might recount it sometime at a family dinner) and once she found out we were ok, and that the car was ok, (though with some heretofore nonexistent scratches on the front bumper) laughed at the whole situation. Its something we laugh at from time to time.

"Remember when you hit CVS?"

...


There was a point to this. Something about me suffering from writers block and it feeling as unyielding as the wall i drove into that fateful day.

Oh, bother. Once again, i got caught up in the setup.




Jamiroquai - Do you know where you're coming from? (One of my favorite songs to cruise to)