LACTOSE AND LECITHIN

This entry is about biscuits.

No, not the "grab em in the" kind - though we can discuss that on another occasion - but rather, the kind that you bake in the oven.

Why biscuits? Well its because i've been craving them since the day before yesterday, and if it hadn't been so hot outside i would have made a batch...twice. However, no air in the kitchen(don't laugh) and a 400 degree oven is not a very good time, even with the window and back door open.

I tried it once, and wound up looking like this:

(stank faced and sweltering. taken right before i wailed on the photographer :P)

So...instead of baking them, i'll blog about them.

Its my opinion that every person worth his/her iodized salt should know how to bake a mean biscuit. In a world(peace don lafontaine) where "artists" with the name "bow wow" are doing sex scenes(do! not! want!) and a kid by the name soulja boy tellem may or may not have a gay sex tape, its nice to experience the relative simplicity and innocence that a biscuit provides. I've never met anyone who doesn't like biscuits*(though i'm sure there are some weirdos who do) and its a simple enough recipe that once mastered, is a nice addition to any repertoire.

Now i went out for a run at the local track tonight. You'd think that all that heavy breathing and my creaky knees would distract me from my biscuit quest, but no. All i could think about those tender moist circles of fluffy goodness. I know, i was being a real lard-a$$ but can you blame me? They are soo good. Bursting with country fresh flavor even.

My recipe is my grandmom's. Time tested and family approved, i'd put her biscuits against anybody's - even yourn. After seeing her make them all my life, at the age of about 20 i decided to give it a go for myself.

They turned out horrible.

The shortening to flour ratio was all off, making them more cookie-ish than anything else(later on my brother also tried his hand at making biscuits with the same result lol) But i didn't let that temporary set back make me give up. (lol @ how i give up on everything else, but food? food i'm in for the long haul.)

I kept at it, and well...you better believe that now i can make durn good biscuit. Not braggin, but yeah. I'm not going to claim they're as good as grandmoms, but should something happen to her, leaving her unable to make her biscuits anymore....well, i'd be more than happy to take up where she left off.

Anyway, this entry is making me hungry so i'm going to end it here.

But yeah, learn to make your biscuits.

Goodie Mob - Soul Food

*just remembered that my uncle doesn't eat biscuits. tsk.