I SHOULDA DONE THIS SOONER!

In a fit of anger, I called my cell phone provider this evening.

A bill came in the mail today, and it dawned on me that even with the discount that i have through my job, i am still paying WAYYYY too much for my phone service.

Now i had heard that if you threaten to leave your cell provider/credit card company/hairstylist that most will make a play for you in order to keep your patronage. I decided to take a gamble on that premise tonight.

I called them hoes up and took on a pleasant-but-peeved role explaining to the customer service rep that I no longer wanted the services of the company, would like my contract canceled, and whats more, i refuse to pay any contract fees.

"Oh, I'm sorry ma'am"

She put me on hold, and then asked if i would mind being transferred to the department which would be able to handle my situation.

"Sure." I stated affably, but firmly.

The woman I was transferred to was American, no tell-tale foreign lilt in her voice. She asked me to explain what my concerns were and I reiterated the same things i told the initial CSR, and closed by saying that I wanted to terminate my service. She listened quietly and when I was done:

"My apologies Ms. _____. Would you please hold?"

"Sure."

At this point i was quite unnerved, wondering if i had gotten a little ahead of myself. What if she came back saying she had canceled my service?? Ugh. I'd be sooo salty. That would be terrible, because I certainly hadn't planned that far. Worst case scenario mode - i began mentally scrolling through the most recent cell commercials i'd seen, wondering which ones had the best plans. And omg I'd have to sign up for a new contract, and would they port my number -

"Ms. ______? We can give you free nights starting at six no charge, i have waived the monthly fee for unlimited texting, and we will give you an additional 20% off the 20% you are recieving through your employer. I have also changed the amount of your current bill due to reflect this."

??!?!?!?!!?!?! What? It worked???? It worked!!!!

I paused long enough to seem like I was really considering her offer.

"Well...that would be fine, thank you." There. Not too eager. Not too stalwart.

She seemed pleased, and thanked me for staying with the company, and asked me if she could be of anymore assistance. My Icarian tendencies reared their ugly heads. Had i conceded too soon? Perhaps if I held out longer, I could have negotiated to a bill of almost nothing?

"No, This is fine. I appreciate your efforts. Thanks again."

Successfully resisting the urge to push it, the conversation was ended there. What a coup!

With skills like this, I'm totally ready to start negotiating for hostages.

...Ok, not really. But, basically.

And then to top it all off, i did some more hula hooping tonight and managed to do a 360 degree turn while hooping! Everything is coming up roses this evening!

In fact, I feel so good that I may bless yall with a "Hey, Its Ok..."

Its just a crazy night!