Don't judge me but...

Sometimes the thought of being a stay at home mom/housewife is INCREDIBLY appealing.

I went shopping earlier today in suburban square which is a an outdoor shopping mall of sorts. Its filled with trendy and expensive boutiques...and the GAP (of course). Located on Pennsylvania's famed mainline, an area in the philadelphia suburbs filled with the richie rich, old money, waspy type. If you've seen the philadelphia story, watched thirtysomething(or so im told -i've never seen it) or read the preppy handbook...you know what i am talking about.

All the women that were out and about, had the understated look of wealth to them(none of that flashy nouveau riche stuff) And the contented, well rested visage that only comes from not having to suffer with the strains of a 9-5. Some of them had their children with them, being pushed in those expensive jogging strollers(you know the ones with three wheels) The others where in groups of two or three, laughing and being utterly chic and carefree.

I can't lie. I was kinda jealous. I mean here I am, trying to cram relaxation and necessities into a 48hour period, while they pretty much have the entire week to do whatever it is that needs to be done, with very little hustle and bustle.

And then I thought, why can't that be me?

I would willingly stay home, cook and clean, sit on the boards of some charities, pop out some good lookin babies(NATCH) if i could meet and marry a man who is willing to foot the bill. (ewww typing that seems some kinda triflin...BUT I'M SAYING THOUGH)

I feel like a traitor to my sex for even thinking this way, but then i rebel against it and think, WHY THE HECK NOT? I'm not lazy(ok maybe i am) but its just that I HATE HATE corporate america. I hate the game, i hate the people, and I hate the compensation. I make a pretty decent living, but its not nearly worth the hassle. And i doubt anything could be.

I'm kinda old school anyway(why do i feel ashamed? I blame the feminist revolution!) plus during my formative years my own mother stayed home so that kind of arrangement seems normal.

At the same time, i like the idea of making my own money, and spending it (c) chi ali. I don't NEED a man to pay my way. I just want him to. Oh Gloria please forgive me. :(

I just need to get my independent wealth on.