MEMORY LANE

On a whim, i decided to go to diaryland(does anyone still use that site anymore?) and see if they still had the few entries i made so many many moons ago.

After racking my brain and finally remembering my login - btw, i don't know why i struggled with recalling my login and password, because save for a few sites i use the SAME password and login for everything. Str8 up if anyone found out what my password was i'd be screwed. lol

But, back to diaryland. So, i reinstated my account and was finally able to take a gander at the entries i had written, in how they say in common parlance, "back in the day".

It was only four entries. I remembered it being few, but not THAT few. It sucks because i was looking forward to reading it like a good juicy novel. I think i'm far enough removed from it now, that i could read my words as one would read a a complete stranger's - with total objectivity. Hm. Okay who am i kidding? I wouldn't be objective in the least. It is me after all. At any rate i still would like to read my thoughts again. Unfortunately i was not a very diligent blogger. Alas Alack and Alaska.

There are some other journals/blogs of mine out in cyberspace that i would love to read, if only i could remember which blog hosting services i was using. I've been having fits and starts with blogging since Y2k. Its sad cuz i haven't stuck with any of them. I'm trying with this one however.

And because i'm all open and feel like sharing, here is my first entry on Dland:

beginnings 4:17 p.m. @ 2001-10-22 Um. This is my first entry. My mind is going in a lot of different places right now. As Jennifer would put it: "My emotional plate is full" and it is. forreal. the 20/20 needs corrective lenses. I can't seem to focus. Work, friends, fam, noneofit. *sigh* Post Traumatic stress? Maybe. I dunno. World trade center mess has me a lil shook. Anthrax. People up in arms. My psyche is disoriented. Information overload. I need to take a break from the media... The new Michael Jackson "Butterflies" is giving me that feeling. I can't describe it. I'm in love it. I have big hopes for this album. I hope it lives up to the hype. Its monday..and i'm gettin into the workweek groove. I may have more to say later, i may not. stay beautiful yall...

Yeah, so thats my first entry. As i read it, I remember how i was feeling @ the time. It was not long after 9/11 and i'll admit, i was freaked. I had been living a pleasant sheltered life up until that point, and when the towers fell i suddenly became conscious of the goings on in the world around me.

I don't know what the "stay beautiful yall" thing was all about, but i'm figuring it was some kind of residual fallout from listening to BOBS five times a day and hanging out @ coffee shops.

I have changed so much since then, yet...in many ways i am still the same.

Let me stop. I'm getting all emo now.

...I really wish i had written more.