THE UNVITATION

If you're a Seinfeld junkie like I am, you probably remember the episode where Elaine is given a late invite to a wedding that is taking place in India. You know, the place where they still have the plague.( i mean really, the plague?) Elaine swears that its a ploy for her kinda-sorta friend, the "braless wonder" to be able to say Elaine was invited, while not really inviting her. Because who can make plans to go to India in a weeks time?(Btw...out of spite - Elaine made it. Whimsy ensued.)

Well im kind of in a similar situation. Not that i recieved an unvitation - thankfully i don't have frenemies like the indomitable sue ellen mishky - more that...well let me just tell you.

One of my close girlfriends, N, is getting married. I found out yesterday, and she's very excited about it. Other than being taken aback(i had no idea she was seeing someone on that level lol) I was/am happy for her. Immediately i thought she would have the standard engagement time of about a year, give or take a month. I began making plans accordingly.

Then she told me it was in July...

of this year.

Oh.

(well thats cool - not all folks have a long drawn out engagement...)


...In Jamaica.


*record scratch*


Now, Jamaica is not as drastic a location as India, but still. Jamaica? July? You're telling me this now? When i have to make plans and get time off and get money together and get hotel reservations and get yall a gift?

oh Drama!

Seriously, this came out of left field. Not long ago she broke up with a previous fiance, with whom she had been best friends since they were tykes. There was some shadiness on his part. One of those nasty situations i hope to never find myself in.(and they wonder why women hate men...l.boogie) Because of this, i had no idea she was mentally or emotionally ready to see someone again, much less, be ready to marry. But what do i know? I'm notoriously private about my own love life, so i shouldn't be surprised that im not always up to speed on the amorous adventures of all my friends.

But, thats neither here nor there.

The question of utmost consequence is, How am i going to make this happen? I do not want to miss my girl's wedding.

I mean would it have killed her to get married in Trinidad?(she's trini) At least i know i could crash with her fam for a few days. I mean really. She could have least have sent out a save the date card or somethin'. Whats the deal with desti-weddings anyway? Actually ive been toying with the idea of a destination wedding for myself. But thats to keep people away...not to invite them to. Oooh im such a hater! lol

But yeah, folks are uppity and too good for city hall? I keed. Ima really have to throttle this girl though.

Not really. But, basically.

Anyway would yall do me a solid? When i start planning my wedding, pleez remind me that if its going to be destination - i have to give all my attendees ample time to get their affairs in order so that they can make it. I don't want to be the subject of any blogs.

i'm buggin.

END PROGRAM MOUNTAINFROMMOLEHILL (omg did i use fortran? lol)

And now, From the putting-it-all-in-perspective-files:

RIP Sean Levert. If you are anything like me, youre response to hearing this sad news was a mixture of "WTF?" and OMG nooo!" Him dying is so surreal. One moment he's going to prison - and the next he's dead? Craziness. My heart goes out to his fam and friends at this difficult time.